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Signs You Are in a Toxic Relationship

toxic relationship

Relationships are a sign of love and commitment. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Whether or not you love a person, it does not mean that you should be with them. As hard as it might be to admit, some people are just not good for you nor your well-being. Regardless of who you are, you are susceptible to a toxic relationship. This is why you need to be aware of these nine characteristics that define a toxic relationship.

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You Feel Unhappy and Drained

toxic relationship
Source: Womenosophy

While some friction is expected in a relationship, it should not be leaving you stressed out and unhappy at all times. The thought of your partner should put a smile on your face and give you a nice gooey feeling. If not, it could be a sign that you are not that happy in your relationship.

A relationship that is not bringing you joy will manifest itself in emotional distress such as anxiety and sadness. You may also have physical symptoms such as headaches and stomachaches. If hanging out with your partner leaves you drained rather than happy and excited, then the relationship may not be the best thing for you.

The Relationship Feels One-sided

A relationship is a two-way street. You should not have to feel as if you are the one putting in all of the work. This is not healthy as it will end up taking too much from you.

If you are in a one-sided relationship, you will find that you are the only one investing time and effort in coming up with day-to-day activities or even planning for the future. It can also be that all the relationship activities such as dates and vacations revolve around what your partner likes, without any consideration to your needs and preferences. If so, you need to sit down and talk it out with your partner. It is unfair if they expect you to hold up the relationship on your own.

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Lack of Respect

Toxic relationship

While love is vital in a relationship, it cannot match up to respect. Without respect, you will have a partner who feels the right to constantly step on you, treat you poorly, and even cheat on you. A disrespectful partner may also demean or insult you in front of your family and friends. Even small patterns can be a sign of disrespect, such as always showing up late or forgetting altogether about important events.

It is important to note that respect in relationships goes both ways. No one deserves more respect than the other regardless of their gender or status. Your relationship should exude mutual respect and love for one another.

Poor Communication

To maintain a healthy relationship, effective communication is paramount. What you will find on the flip side, however, is a partner who is dismissive and does not listen to you or is constantly interrupting you. This does not give you a chance to voice your thoughts, opinions, or feelings.

On the other end, you also do not want a passive-aggressive partner. This means that instead of discussing arising issues, they would rather shut down and ignore the problem at hand. This can leave you frustrated in the long run. This silent treatment stands in the way of effective communication.

An Overly Jealous Partner

Toxic relationship

Some people will argue that jealousy is a display of affection. While no one wants to see their partner with someone else, excess jealousy in a relationship can be toxic. Rather than being loving, your partner’s actions might come off as controlling and manipulative.

If your partner tends to get overly angry when you talk, call, text, or generally in the company of another person, it is a probable sign of excessive jealousy. This can lead to controlling behaviors such as hacking into your social media accounts, looking through your phone, and wanting to monitor your every move. A partner that wants to monitor your every move is also unhealthy.

These obsessive tendencies are not only undermining, but they can also bring a lot of strain to the relationship. You should be able to trust your partner around other people. Otherwise, you may end up pushing your loved one away.

Keeping Score of Mistakes

Everyone makes mistakes. In the same way, everyone deserves a chance for forgiveness. You, therefore, should not hold past mistakes against your partner. This is toxic as it can turn the relationship into a competition of who will mess up the most. The one who makes the most mistakes will therefore end up feeling indebted to the other. This is highly unhealthy as it creates room for resentment. This is because you will not be giving yourself the chance to move on from issues.

To ensure that you are making strides in your relationship and in terms of emotional connection, it is best that you learn to dwell in the present, leaving past actions and behaviors behind. This is the only way in which your relationship can move forward,

Isolation from Friends and Family

The best way to get to understand someone’s character is by how they relate with others. And this is true. This is not just about how they treat strangers but also about how they act in relation to your friends and family. A great way to identify a toxic partner is by one who does not get along with the people who matter to you.

A partner who drives a wedge between you and your loved ones is also not a good sign. In such a situation, you will find yourself spending less time with your family and friends. They will consume you slowly by slowly until you find yourself totally isolated from them.

You are not Yourself with Them

Your partner should love you for who you are. You should not have to tip-toe around them. Not being able to be yourself around your partner is a cause for alarm. They make you feel this way either through efforts to change who you are or by making insinuating comments. Either, you do have to pretend to be something you are not.


Many a time, you will find yourself in a toxic relationship. This can be hard to identify. With the above signs, you can save yourself from this unfortunate situation. 

Read Also: Should you cheat on someone who cheated on you?

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