Learn how to catch a cheater with these 25 easy tricks. When we get a gut feeling that something is not right with our partner we go fishing for further proof. However, sometimes it is better to find the proof yourself before starting a fight.
When we truly know our significant other, it's easy to notice when their behavior starts to change. It is not always a reason for alarm but it feels good to find an explanation.
If we calmly talk to our partner about it and they remain evasive, chances are that something more is going on. You should use these tips on how to catch a cheater before confronting them.
We cover everything from identifying the clues to how to hack their phone and how to catch them in potential lies.
For most, a cheating partner comes as a shock but often there are telltale signs. In a long term committed relationship it might be easier to brush off our suspicions but when our partner displays several signs of cheating, it is time to have a serious conversation.
In marriage and long term committed relationships, it is very normal to make plans for the future. Depending on how serious the relationship is, this might be anything from moving in together to agreeing to be the plus one for a wedding.
When your partner is no longer willing to make long term plans, chances are that they don’t plan on sticking around for much longer. This does not necessarily mean that someone else is in the picture but it could mean that they no longer see a future with you.
These days we practically live on our phones and it contains a whole lot of information about our daily lives. That is why a cheating partner’s phone is the most likely place to find proof of cheating.
The best tool for catching a cheating partner is a spy phone tool.
Using a spy tool you can enter any phone number and it will do a complete deep web search and provide you public data showing you everything there is to know about a certain number. It can reveal past social media accounts, secret profiles, name, address, and other records that show much more information about callers and texters.
When a person has nothing to hide they would not worry about leaving their phone in the other room, or you sitting next to them while they are texting. When they become very protective of their phone or suddenly add extra security features, they probably have something to hide and it's time to start checking who they are really texting.
Just as they are secretive with their phone, a partner that is secretive of their whereabouts is not a good sign. With a GPS Tracking Tool and Phone Monitor you can easily watch their every move. When we ask our partner where they were, the answer should be immediate. If they are telling the truth, they would not have to think for more than a microsecond.
On the other hand, too much information on their whereabouts and who they are with is also suspicious. If they start listing every single person that was there without being asked, they might be trying bury the fact that someone else was there, too. Also, stay alert for places they would usually never go to. Someone that doesn’t like karaoke would not suddenly become a frequent customer at a karaoke bar.
One tool that helps you track the location of a phone is Google. Google actually allows you to track the location of a phone if the phone is connected to a Google account. There are also some apps you can find that track locations of a phone.
This is a common sign of a cheating partner with long term couples. As couples get more comfortable with each other they might spend less time on their appearance. If a partner then suddenly completely changes their hair or the way they dress, it might be to please someone else.
On the other hand, a new haircut and change in wardrobe is not always proof of cheating. Everybody goes through different periods of how they want to express themselves. Look for other signs before jumping to conclusions.
Cheaters have a fear of getting caught, whether they are happy in the relationship or not. So, if they are acting differently when you are out in public together, they might be nervous. Perhaps they are more distant, are more focused on their phone, or try to avoid certain places.
An overall lack of intimacy is a big warning sign but if this only happens in public, then they are concerned about who might notice you together. The cheater might not necessarily be afraid of running into the person they are having an affair with. They might even be nervous the bartender recognizes them from an earlier night with someone else.
Another clue is if they don’t want to be seen in public, at all. If a normally extroverted partner suddenly only wants to stay in, there is probably something they are avoiding. Maybe they are scared of running into certain people.
Most of us live by a certain routine with some having a more flexible one than others. Married couples and long term partners that notice a sudden change in this routine might be facing an additional person in their relationship. In other words, there is someone else getting the cheating partner’s time.
Sudden changes in plans might also indicate someone else becoming a priority. For example, a business trip that gets extended for unclear reasons, unusually late hours in the office or even uncharacteristically long hours in the gym.
Every couple has their own way of being intimate with each other. When there is more distance between a couple or when a partner suddenly displays much more affection, there likely is a reason.
Similarly, sudden changes in a couple’s sex life might also point to extramarital sex. It is normal for couples to go through a dry spell but when there is also a complete lack of intimacy then there are issues at play. On the other hand, a sudden spike in sex drive or a partner suddenly becoming much more romantic might be a sign of guilt.
Of course, life events and stress all affect our sex lives and shared intimacy. Think about what other life events might be affecting the sex life before jumping to conclusions.
Couples fighting is inevitable. It just happens when we are constantly in close quarters. However, if you notice a different kind of fighting there might be an underlying issue.
For example, a cheating partner might get more easily agitated over things they did not mind so much before. Or, the cheater might start nitpicking on their partner or find ways to put them down. Completely irrational arguments are also a sign of frustration.
It is not strange for couples to argue but when there is a constant underlying message of blame or belittling, there might be another cause for their anger.
When we suspect our partner of cheating, it is a good idea to find physical clues. Look for things, events or behaviorial pattern that point to cheating. Something that you can refer to later on when confronting your partner.
Sometimes, our fears take over and we imagine the worst. When dealing with something as serious as cheating we should make sure that we are staying clear headed. That is why keeping a list of suspicious behavior or clues is useful. It helps us organize our thoughts rationally and create a timeline of events.
This list is also useful when we do come to the conclusion that our partner is cheating. Presenting the cheater with this list of evidence gives them less wriggle room to make up a false alibi. The timeline of events might also be a starting point for divorce lawyers, should they come into play.
Our money leaves a trail and it is a very telling one. Checking your partner’s bank statements and credit card statements gives a lot of insight on where they have been and what they are spending their money on. If the cheater is the type of person that prefers to pay by card then every restaurant meal, night at the bar and hotel stay will be on there.
Even small purchases could be revealing, especially if there is a time stamp. Perhaps they said that they would be staying late at the office but they also paid a bar tap on the same night. You might also find unusual locations that are way out of the way of their usual route. All red flags.
Someone’s browsing history is like a snapshot of their thoughts. So, if you have a shared device, check the browsing history after they have used it. It is more telling to check their mobile phone than for example the shared tablet. Do this whenever you can secretly get access to their phone. Alternatively, ask to use their phone through an excuse. For example, you forgot yours at home or the battery is running low.
When checking the browsing history, look for websites that suggest activities. For example, they may have been looking for hotels, both in town or outside of town. If you and your partner are not planning a trip, this is a big red flag. The same goes for restaurants, theaters and museums.
Our sense of smell is much more connected to our memories than we realize. We know what our partners smell like and we would notice if this changes. There are several noticeable scents.
The smell of smoke is the easiest to spot. If the cheater is not a smoker themselves then they have been in the vicinity of someone that does or have gone to a public place with a lot of smokers. Also look for lingering scents of cologne or perfume. Even if the cheater already showered, the other person’s scent might still be on their clothes. Finally, check for make-up stains and stray hairs that are not yours or theirs.
There is a lot of debate on whether sharing rideshare app data is safe but in this case it is highly informative. Certain rideshare apps lets users add trusted persons to the account so that they can monitor where the app user is heading. The original idea behind it is that someone will know where you last were in case of emergencies. However, when we are dealing with a cheater we can use it to check whether they are really heading where they said they were heading.
Uber has a Follow My Ride feature which sends information on your Uber rides to specific numbers. You can monitor the cheater’s movements through this feature. Simply add your own number to the Follow My Ride feature on their account and you get automated messages on their whereabouts, without them even knowing.
Our mobile phones are such an integral part of our lives that it is one of the best ways to catch a cheater. The amount of information we can gather from a person’s phone is just about endless.
The only thing we need to figure out is how to get past the security such us a phone lock, face recognition or thumb print. So, let’s cover that obstacle first.
Yes, smartphones have gotten much better in keeping people out but there will always be a way to hack a phone. The most common screen locks are the fingerprint, patterns, number codes and facial recognition. Here is how to get past each one.
No, these instructions are not some elaborate way to lift someone’s fingerprint. It is not as simple as the internet might lead us to believe. Plus, it requires a very accurate fingerprint to actually work.
A far simpler way is waiting until they are asleep, in deep sleep. Then, take their hand and unlock their screen using their own finger. Wait for a night that they come home drunk - chances are they won’t notice anything in their state.
Once the screen is unlocked it is possible to add a second fingerprint that would also gain access to the phone. In other words, add your own fingerprint. This can be done by going to the phone settings, most likely under the security features tab.
Again, there are several viral web articles on how to trick the facial recognition security feature of both Androids and Apple smartphones. The easier method is skipping the facial recognition and unlocking the phone through a pass code. This should be possible on all phones with facial recognition but how to do it exactly differs per model.
On an Iphone XS press the volume button and side button at the same time. This brings up the Power Slider screen. Press cancel. This gives the option for entering with a pass code instead.
On many other phones it is simply a question of several failed attempts to unlock with facial recognition. Often, after several failed attempts, there will be a prompt that asks whether you want to unlock the screen with a pattern or number code instead.
Patterns and number codes are the easiest screen locks to crack. All it requires is a little peeking at the right time
Just like too many people use the same email password, too many people use the same unlocking pattern on their phone. Letters and numbers are the most common patterns so try their initials and birthday or other special dates. Try the same special numbers for the number pass code.
When it is neither numbers nor letters we need to do some better peeking. The good news is that most people have a pattern that is either 4 or 5 nodes. These are much easier to figure out than 9 node patterns. Number codes are usually only 4 numbers so should also be relatively easy to catch while looking over their shoulder.
Spy apps are one of the more popular ways for how to catch a cheater. However, they are not created equal, though. Some are more informative than others and some were actually designed for different purposes. However, one thing can be said for all; the paid spy apps are much more useful than the free tools.
The most popular spy app is MSpy but there are many more.
These types of apps lets you monitor phone calls, texts, gallery and search histories. When choosing a spy app make sure that it remains hidden on the tracked phone, runs on low storage and does not drain the battery. This minimizes the chance of the cheater finding out about the app.
There are several phone tracking apps that work through GPS. Some are spy apps and can run secretly on the cheater’s phone. Others are based on consent and must be installed on two devices, this shows that both parties agree to the tracking. There are also family style GPS trackers that can link several devices. This type of tracker usually means that all connected devices can keep tabs on each other’s location.
If there have been trust issues in the relationship, consider talking to your partner about sharing GPS tracker apps. This gives both parties more peace of mind. However, if you are doing this to catch a cheater, install a spy app.
If they have nothing to hide then they should also have no issue with you having access to their phone. In fact, many couples add their significant other as the secondary finger print. So, one thing we can do is simply ask our partner for access to their phone. If they don’t want to share their pass code then that is the first red flag.
Today’s mobile phone memory is so expansive that few of us bother to clear out the trash. Frankly, it has become necessary with all the unwanted images we get through group chats. If we are looking for incriminating evidence, the phone gallery quickly follows texts for the best place to start looking.
Look for selfies of men or women that you do not recognize. Suspect that their friends are in on it? Check whether any of them have sent a candid picture of the two cheaters.
Besides looking for people, pay attention to the background and when the picture was taken. Do some mental backtracking and decide whether the time stamp on the photo matches the location they told you about.
When the cheating was more than a drunken one night stand, there are probably conversations between the cheaters. Checking the texts and DMs of a cheater can bring up a lot of information.
Log into their social media accounts like Instagram and Facebook and check which people they have been speaking to and what they talk about. The DMs are usually the place where an affair starts since an affair often starts with just conversation.
Don’t forget to check their texts and check them all. Careful cheaters might have saved the person’s number under non-suspecting name. In other words, Brenda Colleague might not seem suspicious but that could be the person they are cheating with.
The social media account of a cheater can be telling in three ways. TruthFinder is a really cool tool that allows you to see all of their social media accounts and activity.
Firstly, you might spot them with their lover if the affair is between people you both know. There might be clues in their body language or pictures of them together when they should not be in the same place.
The second clue we can gather from social media is from how the cheater presents themselves to the public. Check their relationship status. Also check the pictures of you together, perhaps those couple photos have been deleted or hidden. Serial cheaters tend to keep their significant other off their social media account so their new conquest might not even know the cheater is in a relationship.
The third way to catch a cheater through social media is checking the instant stories of their closest friends. If they said they went out with their buddies, check the accounts of these friends and look for people that you don’t know popping up in their posts. Instagram stories and SnapChats are the best for this kind of stalking.
If video calling is not something you frequently do as a couple it might be a good time to start. There are so many clues to pick up from a video call.
Trick them into showing you their surroundings so you can check where they are and with whom they are. This will either confirm their story or show you instantly that they have been lying.
An unanswered video call is also a red flag. Sure, some people don’t like video calls and never answer them anyway. However, if your significant other normally does answer and now refuses to, they are probably hiding something.
There is one place even the cautious cheater tends to forget about; the trash folder. This is an even better place to look when the phone automatically clears the trash after a certain time limit. The cheater will assume they are safe and don’t bother actually clearing the trash folder, leaving you with the perfect window to check on their recent activities.
The trash folder compiles everything from deleted texts, pictures, videos to apps. Even if the trash folder has been cleared, it might still be be possible to restore the files. Many phones have an automatic gallery backup, for example. So, the cheater may have deleted the picture from the phone but it might still be accessible from their cloud storage.
Yes, we can find out our partner is a cheater through their devices and behavior but nothing is as confronting as actually catching them with someone else. Once you have spotted them together, there is no denying left. These are the 4 best ways for how to catch a cheater red-handed.
Long term couples will have a good idea of where their partner are at any given time. We are creatures of routine, after all. This is why the partner will know best on how to catch a cheater. So, if you know where they should be on any given day, show up at that place. Alternatively, if you have the time and transportation, follow the cheater for a full day.
Here are examples of good excuses for showing up unexpectedly.
- Go to their office and say you want to have lunch together.
- Go to the gym at the same time they take their regular classes or prefer to work out.
- When they went out with friends, grab your own friend and stalk their usual haunts. Say your friend called out of the blue and desperately needed a night out.
Following a cheater for a full day is more time-consuming but it gives you a better picture of what is going on. Showing up unexpectedly means they know you are present and will act accordingly - if they did not get caught yet, that is. Secretly following them lets you see what they do when they think they are alone.
Perhaps they said they would have a full day of errands, are going for a run or have a few appointments before and after work. Follow them to verify if what they said was the truth.
Following a cheater that is on business trips often is also a great way to catch them. Cheaters let down their guard when they leave the city so it will be easier to spot them with someone else. However, do remember to keep your distance during the trip, at least at first.
This is how to catch a cheater without getting caught spying. Personal investigators can be a little pricey but they are much more discreet than chasing after the cheater ourselves. We completed a full guide on how to hire a "Private Investigator Near Me". First of all, PI’s have the advantage of not actually knowing your partner so they can stay close without getting noticed. A personal investigator is also much more skilled in gathering evidence and they have plenty of time to do the tracking.
Another advantage of hiring a personal investigator is that if it turns out the partner is not cheating, there probably won’t be a trail either. Meaning, we might get caught snooping through their phone or tailing their car. That in itself can create a lot of trust issues between a couple. By hiring a PI this trail is avoided and we can continue with our relationship with a rested heart.
Hidden cameras are not just something from the movies. There are plenty of spy products readily available online or from a spy shop in the neighborhood. There are endless types of cameras, ranging in size, disguise and price so there is bound to be one that is perfect for each purpose.
The best places to install a hidden camera are in the cheater’s car and in their private space at home like an office or workout room. These are the places where they feel they have the most privacy and are most likely to contact their lover.
Look for a camera that has a live feed to your personal device, most likely your mobile phone. This lets you monitor them in realtime which also means you can catch them red-handed.
Suspecting our partner is cheating is a horrible feeling. Often, the best way to move past that feeling is confirming for ourselves that they either are or are not cheating. If a careful conversation is not in the cards, these 25 ways to catch a cheater serve as useful tools to get to the truth.
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