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Do Secret Relationships Work?

Secret relationships

Have you ever been in a secret relationship? Did it work? How was the experience? Share your thoughts with us in the comments section.

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Secret relationships are often filled with excitement, anticipation, and intrigue. Keeping your relationship with someone under wraps often creates highly passionate moments between the two of you. 

Having this kind of illicit relationship with someone makes you wonder whether the secret relationship will work or it is just short-lived.

 Besides, secret relationships are more tempting and exhilarating since it is only between the two of you.  Sneaking around and sharing a connection with someone unknown to those around you often has some thrilling experiences. Although the secret relationship can be romantic and exciting, it is at the same time exhausting as no one around you knows about it.

If you are wondering whether that secret relationship will work in the long run? Yes, it can work!  Here are some of the advantages and disadvantages of having a secret relationship 

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Advantages of a Secret Relationship

Sign of pure love

secret relationships

 Getting attention and appreciation to use as motivation in their relationship has been going on over the centuries. However, in this century, it has been made easier via the various social media platforms available.

Most people often post their relationship on social media to chase out the clout, but it might not be happening in the real world.  For secret relationships, it is more about the real bond than a fake bond. A secret relationship and love can be a sign of pure love since you maintain a private space and do not show off to the world just to get attention.

A Break Up is Easy

secret relationships breakup
Source: MensXP

Making every step of your relationship public expresses your much love to the world and how you would like to be together in the next few centuries. This makes you liable to that relationship, and you feel like you owe it to someone to make it work when things do not seem to be working out. When things do not work out anymore because of trust, support, or any other misunderstanding, you are pressured not to break up. 

Dealing with a break is often one of the hardest things to do. Therefore, an advantage of being in a secret relationship is that no third parties will be involved in the event of a break-up. Further, you tend to heal much faster because you won’t face any judgments from society about your breakup.

Removes pressure from the relationship

Once you create a social insight with regards to your relationship, it creates a hole in it. This is because there is much content about it out there, and in the real world, you will be judged based on the relationship content you keep on sharing. Under such a relationship, you will always work out your relationship with what you think is good with society and what is best for you. There will be too much pressure to perform and display that perfect and envious relationship to the public.

A secret relationship gives you both freedom to act according to what you think is best for you and not liable to society’s definition of a perfect relationship. 

Gives it  a private space

Secret relationships

Meeting someone you love in secrecy and spending time together is a different kind of feeling. It gives you a sense of fulfillment and pleasure to the soul. It gives you energy because you are not faking just to show off and maintain the world’s standard but helps you become a better person.

Disadvantages of a Secret Relationship

Fear of being exposed

You probably have been in a secret relationship in your teenage years, trying to keep it a secret to your family and friends. Do you remember how it felt?  With a secret relationship, there is always the fear of being exposed. You always ask yourself what will happen if people come to learn about your relationship.

Besides, secret relationships come with many disturbances in your life as you continuously have to tell lies to your friends and family. 

Can make you feel bad about yourself

A secret relationship affects your physical and mental health and can make you question your self-worth. You can get paranoid, insecure, and most times fearful which may lead to separation from those who care about you deeply and love you the most.

At times secret relationships also create a feeling of self disrespect as you have told numerous lies about it. You feel that being in a secret relationship with that particular person is a betrayal to someone else close to you. The more you continue hiding your relationship, the more you will be selective of what to say to people, and you might end up being stressed about it.

Can be Harmful to your Future Relationship

 If you plan on keeping your relationship secret for some time and then open up about the relationship, it might have a chance of getting damaged. This is because you have previously told so many lies about it to your family or your partner. Rarely can you hide the truth for so long, and chances are when your partner comes to know more facts about it in the future, then it can create some serious damage in your relationship.

Can damage your relationship with other people

Most people are often in a secret relationship as they fear being judged by their loved ones, or even their relationship might face rejection. Such fears cause people to keep their relationships in private, unconsciously postponing future disputes.

If people love and understand you, then you should not hide about your relationship. Stop postponing your fears because the longer you keep the relationship in secret, the harder it will become for them to accept and overcome it.


There could be no exact answer as to whether a secret relationship works or not since it completely depends on what you want from the relationship. If you want the relationship to work and be together for a long time, you can keep it a secret though it all depends on you.

From the above pros and cons, you can weigh whether you want to hide it or not. But if your goal is making the relationship work then, it will work!

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